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Q: I think I’m cursed or possessed or something. I just can’t get free of these bad things in my life. In the past couple of years, I’ve lost several jobs, been homeless, had my husband leave me, had several pets die with no previous illness, and more. It’s even affected people close to me. I am currently living out of a hotel room because my roommate and I got evicted from our home. I think this all happened because I played with a Ouija board years ago. I’ve been to priests and shamans for help, and they don’t think I’m cursed or anything, but bad things keep happening! What is wrong with me? What can I do to fix this? No one is willing to help me, and I can’t keep living like this.

A: First of all, I am so, so sorry to hear about all these terrible things you’ve had to endure. It sounds like it has been a truly trying few years and you are so strong to still be pushing through despite it all. Your situation sounds like a rather complex one, with many layers and unfortunately, that means there isn’t a quick fix to it. Something that has built up over years will take some time and work to remove, but the good news is that YOU most definitely can take care of it yourself!

Based on what you have shared, and assuming the people you’ve gone to are good at what they do and being honest in their assessment, then rather than a “curse,” what I think you have is referred to as “crossed conditions.”

Crossed conditions refer to a state where your energies have basically become all entangled and become weighed down and stagnant. This can manifest as bad things continually happening in your life. Sometimes we can get crossed up by someone or something else, like a curse or hex, but this is not often the case.

What usually happens is that you hit a little bit of bad luck or something bad happens– which is a normal part of life– and rather than moving forward, you get lost in the mess. You let the bad situation knock you off your path, or you try to find someone or something to blame for it, and then you start to get stuck.

Fear and/or anger creeps in. The negativity builds up and may start to cause more “bad luck,” which you then try to blame on the big-bad-mysterious whatever, too. This begins a cycle of bad stuff, more fear, more bad stuff, and so on.

Eventually, you get so mired in it all, that you have now become crossed up. It may feel like a curse or like demons have taken over your life, but really what has happened is this cloud of negativity has almost taken on a life of its own.

Consulting a trusted reader, shaman, or energy worker will also help you to determine if things are being caused by some outside influence or from yourself. Then, it’s time to start uncrossing and setting yourself free!

The first step is to do a good cleansing. I recommend finding a few cleansing methods that you like because you’ll need to do several as you work through the uncrossing process. It’s also a good idea to make cleansing a regular habit afterward to help prevent this from happening again.

Burning sage, using Florida Water, or taking a cleansing bath are all excellent options.

Since we are working to uncross you yourself, I will suggest you start with a warm bath made with a cup of strong, brewed coffee, a handful of sea salt, and 1/4 cup of apple cider vinegar. (Always use caution and check for allergies or reactions to sensitive skin before adding anything to a bath.) This particular blend helps to cleanse away built-up negative energy, psychic grime from others, and release built-up emotional pollution as well.

After the bath, I would also use sage to cleanse your home or living environment, too.

After your initial cleansing, you’ll begin the uncrossing work. This working is full of symbolism and is going to help you reclaim your power and gain control over your life.

  • Find a length of ribbon or cloth cord, the exact size depending on how many things have happened over time. White or purple are good colors for this.
  • Then, tie a knot in the cord for every bad thing that has happened, saying each one out loud if that helps you focus. You may get emotional during this part–just let it happen.
  • Once you have finished, light a white, red, or purple candle and declare that you are no longer controlled by the bad things that happen in your life.
  • One by one, untie each knot, making the same declaration with each one until all have been untied. Allow the candles to safely finish burning.
  • When the cord is completely free of knots, take it and any candle remnants somewhere outdoors and bury them. If you can’t bury them outside, you can also use a potted plant, but out in nature is best.

After the uncrossing work, you’ll want to cleanse your space again and then take another cleansing bath. You can repeat the recipe from the first bath, and to this one, I would suggest adding a little hyssop or hyssop oil to help with the cleansing and uncrossing and to add a bit of protection, too.

Don’t forget to do regular cleansings to help keep the energies flowing and to remove the ick that comes from just living in this world. Future maintenance baths need only be one of the ingredients, or you may use the same blend every time if you wish. This should start undoing the crossed conditions and set you on the path of personal freedom.

The key is to remember that YOU have the power and the control and when things go badly, YOU have the power to fix them. And whatever you can’t fix, process it and let it go, and don’t let yourself get wrapped up in what you cannot control. If things get to be too much for you, don’t be afraid to ask for help before they get too bad again.

Originally posted on Ask Polaris blog 05/31/2018 – updated March 2022


    Ask Alex

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